


We aren't a commercial (Phan)

by Misha_with_wings



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Angst, Arguing, Banter, Comfort, Coming Out, Cuddling, DAN AND PHIL - Freeform, Established Relationship, Fighting, Fluff, Gay, Happy Ending, Japan, Japhan, Kissing, Love, M/M, Making Up, Phan - Freeform, Sleepy Cuddles, YouTube, coming out video, hand holding, happiness, liveshow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-20
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2019-04-25 13:59:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14380113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misha_with_wings/pseuds/Misha_with_wings
Summary: Dan was getting too wrapped up in the platonic-best-friend branding of 'Dan and Phil' that he almost forgot about how much he loved Phil.He had let their relationship suffer as he denied, denied, denied- but after a long talk with Phil they knew what they had to do.Staying hidden behind a brand hurt a lot more than it helped, they were done with it....Truth turns to freedom, freedom turns to happiness.





	We aren't a commercial (Phan)

Dan didn't know why things were suddenly so tense, Phil was on edge and Dan didn't know what was fueling it- even though he did have a fairly good idea. 

One little slip-up, that's all it took. 

"Phil?" Dan speaks out breathily, hearing Phil pass the lounge doorway. 

He hears the footsteps stop and Phil lingers in the hallway for a few seconds before hesitantly stepping in the room, "What?"

Dan finds himself unable to think of words to say, he can't just say he's sorry because there's nothing to really pointedly apologize for. He just said something wrong, the air between him and Phil was thick with an unsettling problem that neither of them wanted to speak of. 

"I-" Dan immediately shuts his mouth, unable to speak and too scared to upset Phil further. 

He hears Phil's mildly annoyed huff and he could almost feel the angered energy from Phil crossing his arms and staring, "Dan?"

"I didn't-" Dan let's his brain momentarily unscramble, his voice was shaking, "I didn't mean that... you know I wouldn't-"

Phil scoffs and Dan flinches, he just wished Phil wouldn't be so angry at him. He hated it. 

"Dan you-" Phil begins to raise his voice but he stops and let's out a deep breath, "Never mind." He turns to leave. 

"No." Dans head immediately turns so he can look at Phil, "Don't you do that."

"Do what!?" Phil asks loudly.

"Don't you ignore me... don't do that." Dan reaches up to shakily push his fringe away from his forehead, a mess of curls and frizz, "Please." Dan gives Phil that look that usually makes him forgive and forget. Sadly this issue went a little deeper than some small 'I broke something' or 'I forgot to do my part in cleaning the house'.

Phil looks away from Dan's eyes, his heart felt tight and heavy with sadness and anger mixed with a bit of insecurity. "Why?" Phil's voice cracked, signaling an upcoming wave of emotion and tears. 

Dan wanted to hug him but he knew the contact wouldn't be appreciated right now, "I don't know... I got scared- you know when I slip-up I try to cover my ass and end up fucking up more..."

"You could've just let it be." Phil says, "Remember when I read out some stupid 'you and dan are so married' comment? I just let it be and went on with my life."

"This wasn't some small comment!" Dan huffs and let's his heart rate go back to normal, he didn't want to yell. "You know what our fans saw- then I read that and I just- I panicked!"

"So what, a blurry picture of me sleeping on your shoulder in an airport." Phil shrugs, "It's not like they caught us making out Dan!"

"But you were cuddling me and I was holding your hand- we can't pass that off as platonic!" 

"Well not now we can't!" Phil raises his voice, his stare burned into Dan, "What you did on your live show... that- that hurt me." 

Dan could hear the waver in Phil's voice and he felt the ball of sad guilt growing in his stomach, "Babe-"

"Don't." Phil shakes his head, Dan releases a sad sigh. 

"You know I didn't mean that..." Dan gives Phil a warm look, trying to make him see that he was genuine. "I love you Phil, you know that." 

Phil's bottom lip wobbles ever so slightly and his eyes gloss over, he quickly sucks it up and continues, "Why did you even think to say that if it wasn't true?"

Dan thinks back to the live show, cringing at himself as he remembers his hurtful words, "No I'm not dating Phil! Jesus guys, you never give us a break do you?" That was just the beginning of it, immediately the fans began noticing Dan's body language and they pressed him further, "C'mon guys, aren't I a little too pretty for Phil?" Dan jokes, immediately wishing he hadn't, the chat suddenly filled with comments like, 'dan thinks phil is ugly!' 'Dan that's mean' and of course comments like 'lol dan is right', Dan wanted to get angry about those comments but he did start it. "Smarter than Phil too." Dan reads out from the chat before laughing, remembering some adorably idiotic thing Phil did that morning, "Yeah you got me there, that ones true." But the people who didn't understand what Dan meant went off, 'they hate each other?' 'Dan really is mean to phil...', "Oh yeah guys, I'm so mean to Phil. He's just an easy target really." Sarcasm laced his voice but not many people understood it- including Phil. The livestream continued with Dan making unneeded rude comments in reference to Phil. 

Dan breathed shakily, "Phil- God, i'm so sorry..."

Phil emits a light scoff, "You're sorry?"

"You aren't ugly- I didn't mean it like that when I said it." Dan decides to try and explain himself, "In my mind I was just thinking how like... you're the hot one and I'm just apparently a soft pretty boy- according to our fans." 

"So you say you're too pretty for me? Dan you make no fucking sense!" Phil yells, he immediately decides to move on, "What about saying I'm stupid?"

"I- I did not- absolutely did not- call you stupid!" Dan raises his voice, "You are the smartest person I know! I love the way your mind works and you're actually so intelligent it's scary-"

"That whole live show was just you bashing me!" Phil exclaims. 

"I freaked out!" Dan replies, "I thought people knew about us!"

"So what if they did." Phil shrugs, "So you think them not knowing is more important than our actual relationship?" 

"What-?" Dan does a double take, "No!" 

"All you focus on is this stupid brand of 'Dan and Phil', you don't care if you hurt me, you just do whatever you can to keep the brand alive and keep us hidden. No matter if it hurts me." Phil says, he stares at Dan, watching him for any signs of mistruth. 

"We've built our life around this 'brand' Phil, we are the brand!" Dan yells, "We can't break the wall between the brand of 'Dan and Phil' and our actual relationship. It's dangerous- everyone would know and everyone could see, and judge..." 

"So the brand is more important to you than us is it?" Phil genuinely asks, not a hint of joke.

"No, definitely not, but it's important. We have to keep it alive so nobody finds out." Dan says. 

"Lately all you've been doing is trying to keep the brand alive while watching our personal relationship die." Phil says, "You're too busy with videos and interacting with fans and putting up this whole 'best friend' cover. I think you've forgotten about us actually being in love here- if we even still are." 

'How could Phil say that' was Dans first thought, of course they were still in love. They had been for almost nine years now. "I'm just trying to stabilize things... I need the brand to be forced so I can feel safe." 

"What about me?" Phil asks, "How do I play into this?"

"You're half of the brand Phil." Dan says, immediately regretting it because that isn't what Phil meant. 

"Oh?" Phil let out a bitter sounding laugh, he felt hurt.

"That came out wrong-"

"Shut up already." Phil says making Dan look taken aback, "Im nothing more than this brand to you?!"

"No! Phil I love you, I'm in love with you!" Dan yells, "I-"

"Stop it- for the love of-" Phil was fuming, hurt and anger seeping into his bones, "We're just a brand."

"No." Dan shakes his head, "You're wrong..." he was trying to fix this. 

"When's the last time we did something together that wasn't for 'Dan and Phil'?" Phil crosses his arms, staring at Dan.

Dan thinks, it had been weeks. All they've done is film videos and do live shows. Sure they'd watched some television together but they were seated on opposite sides of the sofa when they'd normally cuddle. Things were falling apart and Dan just now noticed. They used to always sleep together now they don't even go to bed at the same time and they sleep in separate beds- Dan didn't think anything of it until now. 

When was the last time they even properly cuddled? Hell it had to have been a week, Dan thinks. He was pretty sure he hadn't even kissed or hugged Phil in like three days and they hadn't had sex in well over three weeks. 

That wasn't normal, not for them, not for the two inseparable boys. They always gravitated towards each other, they always managed to cuddle and laugh together for hours. They always shared sweet little kisses when passing each other in the hallway. They always made time to love each other late at night because to them it was important to be that close and vulnerable and open with each other. 

Now, well now... Dan didn't know what to think. 

"Exactly." Phil says with a slight nod, taking Dans silence for an answer. 

Dan was sad, that's all he could feel right now. He loved Phil more than anything and he doesn't know why he let it get this bad. It doesn't help that he kept turning Phil down when he asked to do small things like go for a late night walk or just watch a movie. 

"Phil..." Dan whimpers, looking up at him with teary eyes. He watches as Phil flops his body onto the opposite end of the sofa. 

"What are we doing Dan?" Phil sighs running his hand down his face.

"I-" Dan swallows thickly, "I don't know, but I don't think I like it." 

"I feel like our relationship is ending Dan, and I don't like it. We're too clingy to this best friend branding, we're too dedicated to hiding..." Phil trails off. 

"What are you saying?" A cold feeling washed through Dan's heart making him start silently crying. 

"I'm saying our relationship isn't what it used to be. I love you Dan... but I think it's-" Phil takes a deep breath and Dan can see tears rolling down his cheeks, "I think it's time."

"P-Phil?" Dan had so many questions and he was feeling so many things, his heart was pounding and his face was wet with tears, "What-?"

"Everything ends Dan." Phil gulps, it felt like his heart was actually breaking apart inside of him, "Eight years is a long time... sometimes things just- just burn out, I thought we were meant to be- almost like soulmates- but maybe it was all in our heads. All I know is I don't want to live without you but I think life is steering us in opposite directions. Maybe we have to just let this go-"

"Are you-" Dan takes a minute to recollect himself and hold himself together. It was only a matter of seconds before he was going to break down in a fit of tears. His chest hurt with this heavy pressure like feeling, "Are you breaking up with me?" 

Phil doesn't move to nod or shake his head, he stays silent for a minute as if he was contemplating speaking, "I don't want too." 

"Then don't!" Dan yells, "I need you! Phil I'm so sorry for what I did, but we can fix this..." 

"Do you want to fix it or are you just going to push me away even more?" Phil asks, sounding almost bitter. 

"No." Dan says, collecting his thoughts, "Not anymore. I'm not going to push you away." 

"I can't handle this branding anymore Dan..." Phil looks at Dan and his eyes were overflowing with tears and he looked so sad and vulnerable, "It's not helping us anymore it's tearing us apart."

Dan has been thinking about this a lot, "Let's drop it then." He says, sounding completely serious, "We are more important than our fake personas we hide behind when the camera is on. I'm done with it, I love you and I'm sick of not being able to just hold your hand in public dammit! Sure I'm terrified of what people think of me but you are so much more important Phil- you are everything to me. I only want you, fuck everyone else. We can take a break from all of this video shit and just go somewhere for a while, take a holiday with just us- no youtube- no 'Dan and Phil'."

Phil looked nervous and unsure, "You're serious?"

"Deadly." Dan replies, "I know you want this and I do too."

"This is big Dan... they'll all know. They'll test our relationship and you know it, are you sure you want this?" 

"I do." Dan says surely, "I have you, you have me. These people can test us all they want, it's only what we think that matters. It'll be rough and rocky for a while but it'll be good for us in the long run. We won't have to edit out small touches or flirty interactions, we can be free. We don't have to act any differently, we don't have to shove our relationship out there. We can simply be us, instead of Dan and Phil, Dan with Phil."

Phil gives him a genuine smile, his eyes still watery, "Jesus- Dan I love you so much." 

"I love you too." Dan replies, smiling back. "We're gonna do this then we're gonna take a break. We don't have to tell them any details we just simply have to ditch the best friend branding. We aren't a commercial for anyone else, we are us. They don't need to know everything." 

Phil nods, "Alright. Agreed." He takes a deep breath, "How long should we take a break for?"

"A month maybe?" Dan shrugs, "We shouldn't make a set date, we should just do what feels natural. We can go on a nice long holiday and drink too much, enjoy each other's company, and have way too much sex." 

Phil laughs breathily, "I'm in." 

"We can plan out what we're gonna do tomorrow, it's late." Dan yawns as he reads the time, almost two am. 

Phil stands up and holds out his hands with a smile, he pulls Dan up off of the couch, "Im so sorry I almost tried to break up with you though." 

"You can't break up with me Phil, we're inseparable soulmates." Dan laughs, he doesn't let go of Phil's hands and instead pulls him closer so they were chest to chest. 

"I thought you didn't believe in soulmates?" Phil questions, resting his forehead against Dan's. 

"I don't know. If it is real then we definitely are soulmates, if not then..." Dan shrugs, "We still belong with each other."

"Alright, cheesy." Phil says with a satisfied sigh, he missed this. 

"You love me." Dan says. 

Phil closes the gap between their lips, letting them linger together before pulling away, "I do."

Dan clings to Phil and buries his face in his neck, "Let's go to bed."

Phil laughs and wraps his arms around Dans back, he was really too cute, "You gotta let go of me first." 

"Ugh." Dan pulls away, before beginning to walk out of the room, Phil gives him a light slap on the bum as he walks by making Dan jump and emit a squeak of surprise. "Phil!"

Phil smirks at Dan before busting out in a fit of laughter, "You look so offended!"

"Well if you're gonna smack my ass do it like you mean it." Dan winks at Phil making him choke on a laugh. 

They both felt at ease as they fell back into their naturally playful demeanor. 

They chase each other down the hallway before finding themselves crawling beneath a blue and green duvet and brightly colored sheets. 

Dan presses himself against Phil's side and lays his head on Phil's shoulder. His hand aimlessly traces across Phil's chest, "You know I feel like we're gonna be closer now."

Phil hums lightly in reply, his arm that was wrapped around Dan squeezes tighter. 

"This is gonna be a good thing for us." Dan says, "We will be able to be who we are, fuck the people who think they have any control on our lives because they don't. It's just us." Dan tangles his fingers with Phil's and squeezes his hand. 

"We might get some hate, are you ready for that?" Phil asks, he knows how Dan is with that kind of stuff. 

"I'll be fine. I have you." Dan snuggles closer, "I want this."

"I want this too." Phil presses a kiss to Dan's hair making him hum lazily. "Goodnight Dan."

"Night." Dan mumbles sleepily into Phil's neck, tomorrow was going to be stress inducing and he needed rest. But this was going to be good for them, they both knew it. "I love you so much Phil."

"I love you too." Phil says, sounding as fond and as in love as ever. "I really really love you too."

The next day they sat on Phil's bed in front of the camera, nothing was scripted and both of them were nervous. 

"Ready?" Phil asks as he reaches to turn on the camera. 

Dan gives him a sure but subtle nod, "Do it."

Phil settles back down beside Dan, absentmindedly grabbing his hand. Dan immediately tangles their fingers together, comfort. 

You couldn't exactly see their hands in the frame but it didn't take a genius to see why their arms were that close together and why they moved together. 

Dan sighs before counting down for Phil, "Three... two... one-"

"Hey guys." Phil says, not as cheery and loud as usual. Both of their bodies radiated nervousness. 

"Hello." Dan does a little wave. 

"So, I think it's time for a little chat, what do you think Dan?" Phil bumps his shoulder against Dan's making Dan feel a bit better.

Dan gives Phil a small yet fond smile, "Yeah."

Phil decides to take the lead since Dan was nervous, he was almost visibly shaking, but he wanted this. 

"So me and Dan have some breaking news that I'm sure not a single one of you will expect..." Phil says with a hint of sarcasm making Dan laugh.

"Oh yeah, this is a never heard before theory. Nobody has ever contemplated this being a thing before." Dan scoffs and rolls his eyes, he squeezes Phil's hand tighter, smiling when he feels Phil's thumb rub against the back of his hand. 

"Some of you will scream, some will cry, some might even unsubscribe." Phil shrugs, "But it is what it is, and it really doesn't change much, does it?" 

"Not really." Dan shrugs just like Phil, "Our videos won't change, our personalities will stay the same... nothing will really be that different- so you all can breathe don't hyperventilate please." 

Phil laughs lightly at Dan's words, "Should we say it?" 

Dan gives him a small nod in reply before the both speak in unison, "We're together."

"Pause for screams-" Dan immediately says making Phil shove him. 

It's like there was suddenly a weight lifted off both of their shoulders, they could breathe freely. It felt so amazing to just be able to be them with no limits and no holding back. 

"That's all we're gonna say." Dan adds a minute later. 

"That's all you need to know." Phil says, "We aren't a commercial for everyone else." Phil adds, quoting Dan from the day before. 

Dan smiles at him, "Exactly." 

"We love you guys and we hope you stick with us. Nothing's gonna change, we're still us. We're still the goofy, sarcastic, and occasional innuendo making duo you all love." 

"Well said Phil." Dan approves. 

"Now..." Phil begins, giving Dan a look. 

Dan swallows thickly, "Now comes the part we know you aren't going to like." He sighs, "But we need this."

"We're gonna go away for a while, take a break." Phil says, "Not forever, just a month maybe."

"We won't be on YouTube or any social media, this is just going to be time for us. We hope you respect this and our decisions and we'll see you guys soon." 

"Bye guys!" Phil says before covering the camera with his hands and turning it off. 

"Are we happy with that?" Dan asks, slowly releasing his grip on Phil's hand. 

Phil nods, "We said what we needed too, that's all that matters." 

It was quick and easy to edit and Phil had it uploaded to his channel by that night. 

"I'm scared to know what they're saying..." Dan says, he was shrinking into himself, his knees clutched to his chest. 

"Babe if you keep curling up you are literally going to become one single entity with the sofa." Phil giggles and rolls his eyes as he pulls up YouTube. 

"Good, Dan and couch, I ship us." 

Phil scoffs at Dan before going to the comment section on the new video. 

"Read me some." Dan requests. 

Phil clears his throat, "Alright, 'omg yes adopt me please dads!' Does that satisfy you?"

Dan face-palms, "There's always one..."

"Oh there's more than one, 'adopt me' seems to be a common theme here." Phil chuckles, "Aww listen to this, 'we love and respect your decisions, your guys' happiness is what matters most, go live it up and have fun on your break we will be here waiting!'." 

Dan smiles softly, "I'm happy."

"Me too." Phil says with a satisfied sigh as he likes that comment, he scrolls through more comments, reading them aloud. 

'You guys are actually the cutest'

'I fucking knew it lol, love you boys xx'

'Wow. Much breaking news. Such Phan. Very scream.' This one earns a fairly big chuckle from Dan. 

'Enjoy your break babes!'

'Fucking finally' Dan and Phil both laugh at this one because yes, finally. 

'Get married.' 

"Wow they're really pushing this aren't they?" Dan laughs as Phil reads the marriage comment. 

"Yeah- ugh." Phil suddenly glares at his screen. 

"What is it?" Dan asks. 

"Found the first rude comment." Phil replies.

'Just when I thought Dan was coming to his senses about Phil being an ugly dumb worthless human it turns out he's dating him! Sorry Dan, unstanned.'

Dan audibly growls, "If this little-"

"Dan." Phil cuts him off. 

"If she wasn't like fourteen-"

"Dan!" Phil warns. 

"She called you mean names! You aren't ugly, dumb, or worthless!" Dan exclaims. 

"I know baby, it doesn't affect me any. It's alright." Phil gives him a genuine smile, "Don't work yourself up over it." 

"Alright." Dan grumpily leans into Phil's side. 

Phil closes YouTube and goes to twitter, "We're trending number three worldwide." 

"How the-?" Dan gave Phil a dumbfounded look, the video hasn't been up that long.

"Over a million tweets about it." Phil says as he lazily scrolls through the hashtag 'WeLoveDnP'.

"All good ones?" Dan asks. 

"There's like five thousand positive tweets for every one negative one, don't worry about it honey." Phil says. 

"Honey." Dan mocks with a scoff. 

Phil sticks his tongue out at him, "It's mostly just people saying they're proud of us, they love us, they hope we have a nice time on break, and they want us to get married and adopt a dog." 

Dan laughs breathily, "I don't say it enough but I love our fans."

"Me too." Phil sighs, closing his laptop, "So I may have booked us a flight somewhere and a hotel for three whole weeks..." 

Dan shoots up, sitting straight, "What?!" 

"Surprise." Phil smiles, his tongue poking between his teeth. 

Dan's heart felt fuzzy because Phil was so damn adorable, "Where are we going? Why didn't you let me help pay for the hotel room!?" Dan yells. 

"It's fine Dan, really." Phil giggles, "Where have we been wanting to go back to since we left?" 

"Um..." Dan suddenly gasps wide-eyed and looks at Phil, "No you didn't!" A smile fights it's way to his lips. 

"Ja-phan is back baby!" Phil laughs, only to laugh harder when Dan gives him a disapproving glare. 

"First of all- never say that again." Dan begins, "Second of all-" Dan tackles Phil to the sofa, "I fucking love you!" 

"As for the hotel... you can just repay me in kisses." Phil says before over-dramatically puckering his lips. 

Dan rolls his eyes and laughs, "You spork-" He kisses Phil, giggling against his lips. "I'll repay you in more than kisses you-" Dan cuts himself off by kissing Phil yet again. 

Five days later they were clambering into their hotel room, dragging heavy suitcases behind them. They were worn out and looked like a right mess but they were so happy. 

"We made it." Dan sighs and collapses onto the giant bed, letting a satisfied moan leave him as his body sinks into the comfortable mattress. 

Phil walks around Dan's suitcase he had abandoned in the middle of the floor, laughing at Dan's dramatic reaction to laying on a bed. "You're so perfect sometimes." 

"Sometimes?" Dan asks, opening one eye to look at Phil.

Phil leans down to kiss him, a giggly smile adorning his lips, "Sometimes." He confirms. 

"Put your shit down and cuddle me." Dan demands with a sleepy smirk on his face. 

Phil quirks an eyebrow, "Well, well, well... doesn't someone just think they're all that and a side of chips today?"

Dan tries to suppress a laugh and fails, ending up in a giggly red-faced mess. 

Phil sets his suitcase down, "I'm guessing we'll unpack after we nap?"

"Mhm." Dan hums a confirmative reply. 

Phil slips off his shoes, watching as Dan physically kicks his off, making them connect loudly with the hardwood floor. 

Phil climbs up next to Dan and wraps his arm around the younger mans waist, he presses soft kisses to his neck. 

"Stoooop!" Dan whines, fighting to get away from Phil's lips. 

Phil smirks before nipping at Dan's ear, "Make me." 

Dan quickly rolls over so he was straddling Phil and pressing him into the mattress, "Stop." He tries to hide his smile. 

Phil crosses his arms, looking up at Dan with a cocky expression, "You're adorable."

"If I wasn't so tired I'd let you take me right here and now." Dan flops down against Phil's chest and nuzzles into the crook of Phil's neck. 

Phil breathes out a light laugh, his hands tracing up and down Dan's sides, "Maybe later."

"Definitely later." 

Phil can feel Dan's lips turn into a smile from where they're pressed to his neck, "I love you." Phil yawns.

"I love you too." Dan yawns, following suit, "And stop that yawning shit." 

Phil scoffs, "Go to sleep, you're grumpy." 

"Bite me." 

Phil sighs, feeling Dan slowly drift off, "That's my boy..." he chuckles softly before kissing the top of Dan's head and relaxing.

It's hard to believe they were fighting mere days ago, now they were closer than ever and so ready for life. 

Both of them were so incredibly happy, and the timing of coming out was almost perfect. It wasn't rushed nor was it too late, it was perfect and it was on their own terms. 

This was their thing, their love, nobody else mattered when it came to this. Nobody needed to know details about what went on between them, they are simply free to show the world who they truly are. 

No more hiding, no more lying, no more edit-that-out, no more panicked excuses. Just the satisfying feeling of finally and freedom to breathe. 

They aren't a commercial for anyone else.

**Author's Note:**

> Hopefully you enjoyed this, please leave some kudos or a comment as I highly appreciate it!
> 
> I love hearing thoughts and ideas!
> 
> Thanks for reading :)


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